PART 1: The Springfield PD responded to a call this morning from Southgate Baptist Church ("A Place to grow"). Apparently a disgusting, filthy, worthless bum had taken up permanent residence on the church's property overnight, so someone called the police specifically to run him off. --> As you may have guessed, the bum was me. You probably think I'm going to badmouth the church for calling the cops on me, right? Well, I'm not going to. Their call didn't inconvenience me the slightest bit. In fact, I was already preparing to leave when the cops showed up. --> Instead, I'm going to badmouth the church for being total hypocrites. They choose to subscribe to a religion that doesn't allow them to make judgments, yet they still feel compelled to make completely uninformed judgments at a rate beyond comprehension. First they judged a tent's hidden occupant to be a lower form of human life
than themselves. Then they judged the bum to be unworthy of spending a morning on God's property...