Thursday, September 21, 2006

Mark Cuban's Movie Challenge

I accidentally found my way to Mark Cuban's blog about a month ago. Before reading any of it, all I knew about him was that he owns the Dallas Mavericks. It turns out, however, that he also owns Landmark Theaters and Magnolia Pictures (and some other stuff, too).

In one of his blog entries, Cuban challenges his readers to come up with a revolutionary marketing idea that will get millions of people off of their couches and into movie theaters. A snippet from his blog entry:

This is an open challenge. [If] you come up with a solution, you get a job. Seriously...

...Only HDNet takes more time out my day than trying to solve this problem. Its the holy grail of the movie business. How do you get people out of the house to see your movie without spending a fortune. How can you convince 5 million people to give up their weekend and go to a theater to see a specific movie without spending 60mm dollars.

(Read the entire entry.)

As I write this, there are 1,157 comments in response to his challenge. But I don't think he has found his "winner" yet.

After I read Mark Cuban's challenge, I wrote him a short e-mail, asking him to clarify his objective. Paraphrashing, I asked him, "Is your main objective to attract more people to YOUR theaters, or is your main objective to attract more people to EVERYONE's theaters?" It might seem like a stupid question, but it is actually a very valid question, especially considering how vague he was in his blog entry.

He never responded.

How is anyone supposed to help him solve his most pressing problem if he doesn't clearly explain the problem?

Having re-read his entry today, I now suspect his objective is something totally different than what I originally thought. I don't think his objective has anything specifically to do with either Landmark Theaters or any other theaters. Instead, I think his objective is to find the magic marketing strategy that'll attract millions of people to theaters showing films distributed by Magnolia Pictures. But I don't know if that is his objective, either, because his blog entry is unclear and because he chose not to respond to my question.

Mark, I could have spent the last month racking my brain for you, figuring out the magic marketing strategy that'll get millions of people into Landmark Theaters. But you wouldn't tell me if that is your objective, so I haven't done it. I could have spent the last month racking my brain for you, figuring out the magic marketing strategy that'll boost revenue in the movie theater industry as a whole. But you wouldn't tell me if that was your objective, so I haven't done it. I could have spent the last month racking my brain for you, figuring out the magic marketing strategy that'll get millions of people into theaters to see movies distributed by Magnolia Pictures. But you wouldn't tell me if that was your objective, so I haven't done it.

What is your god-damn objective, dude?

If you tell me your objective(s) clearly, I'll work the magic for you. I guarantee it! (You can e-mail me, comment here, or call me anytime at 614-738-3867.) But if you don't tell me, there is no way I can possibly help you. If you don't clearly define your objective(s) to the masses, there is no way anyone can possibly help you. I, for one, am not going to try to read your mind.

If you want to see what I can do, visit the Pizza! The Movie web site. Once you've checked out the site, contact Michael Dorian (the filmmaker) and tell him Ryan Powell sent you. Then buy the god-damn film from him because apparently he's just sitting around waiting for someone like you to knock on his door (which is too bad because it's a damn good movie, and the way things are going, no one will ever see it). After you've bought it and arranged for its theatrical release, set me up with a small budget so I can spread the word. I'll get it done. No bullshit! And I'll do it for free.

Then you can fund Aimless, and I'll do it again. After that, I might take you up on your job offer.

I have not studied marketing formally, but I understand the shit. If my third "Objective Hypothesis" is correct, you need to be able to answer this question: "Why should I buy your product instead of this other product?" More specifically, "Why should I pay to see your company's movie instead of that other company's movie?" That's not an easy question to answer effectively.

Do you have that answer? I have that answer for "Ryan's Pizzeria," and I could back it up if "Ryan's Pizzeria" only existed. I could find the right answers for you, too, even if I had to make shit up whenever "Some Movie" isn't actually worth seeing.

I am very serious, Mark Cuban. I expect to hear from you and I expect to solve your problem.